I woke up in a really bad humour on Saturday - I was so angry with the thought that I might have been the victim of a pickpocket last night and needed to get to Citibank quick smart to replenish my supplies. I am paranoid about not having money on me expecially when using foreign credit cards is so difficult - so I thought I would get some money, and then make my way over to the other side of the city - Asakusa - so get the Tobu -Nikko railway line to Nikko. HOWEVER, my barclaycard had stopped working! Can you imagine my horror? I lunged for my iphone and looked up Barclays in my contact list..and pressed call... Screw it I will deal with it all now - remember my debit card had stopped working the other day....so after going through the usual tedious security questions like what is your foot size? What did you spend on April 4th 1987? What is the meaning of life?......you no the usual dull bull shit, I was able to have a little chat.

I explained that despite my going on line BEFORE I came and advising Barclays that I was coming to Tokyo - after I had used it at Tokyo airport they STOPPED my card! Dear little Marlene was stumped for an explanation despite my asking her to explain how this could have happened several times....She asked whether I would like to make an official complaint...,"MMMM NO. I'M ON BLOODY HOLIDAY TRYING TO CATCH A TRAIN - PLEASE, I JUST NEED YOU TO MAKE MY CARDS WORK"!...So with my debit card, sorted I moved onto my barclaycard - but of course she couldn't assist with that- that would have been to obvious - no, I had to be transferred - so I was - to Bangabloodylore! GREAT! It was honestly like swimming through treacle or better still, Knitting fog! So this wound me up - as if I needed winding up any further. We couldn't even resolve the "Is it a credit card or a debit card question"! So I heard the ultimate solution - "One moment please - I refer to my supervisor" - FOR CHRISTS SAKE....I was referred back to England to George who I'm afraid got "both barrels"...George was in the Fraud dept and was concerend that I was in Tokyo? Sorry What? I go abroad all of the bloody time...check my files! Why do you make it so frigging painful and why do I have to pay for these calls on my mobile? I got the scripted responses - which in summary means they really really don't give a toss about you or the inconveninece they cause - thankfully I eventually got what I needed - my cards were turned back on and I was away wallet replenished with Yen - Jesus - what a saga - but how fortunate I put the Barclays numbers in my iphone!

When I got to the subway station of Asakusa, I made my way to the main train station...well I say "main" it's in the basement of a worn out dept store and is "tired". Now managing to find the times and routes was impossible because all of the departure boards at street level are in japanese - there is NO Engiish..it's only after you pass through the ticket barriers which are upstairs do they put english up on the boards..but I managed to get a ticket from the ticket office and established I needed to get the 11.50 on Platform 4 - How wonderful - I'm not sure why I felt like I had just climbed Everest - I travel all the time...but it was strangely satisfying to me that I had managed to buy a train ticket and get myself out of Tokyo..weird! I had just missed a train so I had a walk about the markets in Asakusa where I was earlier this week seeing the famous Shrine there. It was bustling.

30 minutes later, I found Platform 4 and sat down - again admiring Japanese efficiency. The train arrived and the doors opened on the other side of the platform - off came the commuters and on went the cleaning staff who looked so clean and tidy they could easily have been conducting open heart surgery in carriage 2. They cleaned the windows, the floors - it was a well reheared show...even though you knew they had no litter to pick up - because in Tokyo there is NO Litter and there are no litter bins! Everything has to be recyled - londoners don't give a toss - I think leaving a half eaten Big Mac on a train in Tokyo, would probably result in instant death....and I get depressed just thinking about the unsightly platform that often greets me at St James Station in Walthamstow as I commute into Liverpool st.. with the platform strewn with fast food boxes and half eaten junk food. Why can't we have just a bit more respect for where we live?

Back on the train, I was surrounded by a handful of pilgrims - all clearly excited to be going to Nikko to see the world famous shrines. When we got on the train the elderly cabal of pilgrims that got onto my carriage were all quietly talking over each other clearly excited about the day ahead as they gently dived into their Bento Boxes - which in retrospect was a clever move on their part! My stomach was rumbling! I watched admitedly a little forelorn, as I sipped my bottle of unsweetened green tea (Yuk...but I'm getting used to it!)..while they devoured succulent fresh sushi. They were meticulous not dropping a single grain of rice anywhere....refreshed, full and all tidy - they sat back into their tiny little seats on the train and fell into a relaxed, satisfied mood.. Some fell asleep whilst others compared their newest handbags...

I had caught the regular train service which meandered its way out of the station and into Tokyo. As we clattered our way though you developed a sense of how sprawling Tokyo is, but gradually we left the hustle and bustle behind and went through the districts and eventually into the country side.

As we went I noticed how beautiful japanese gardens are - everywhere - rich and poor.. it didn't matter. What incredible pride they all take and what hard work it must be to maintain them...Brits are kean gardeners but maintaining the trees as they do i Japan with the clever pruning "Clouding" technique is beautiful...a real art. You notice that every spare piece of land however small, is used to either grow vegtables, flowers, shrubs or rice...the paddi fields are vast....with their intricate irrigation systems...I saw locals fly fishing; washing; cleaning, all busy as bees...I loved it.

Even garages and petrol stations and other usually mundane carbunkels had carefuly tendered gardens filled with plants and flowers like hydrangea's with their huge pink and blue heads making even the darkest corner feel bright and wholesome. In London it would have been filled with a tax dodging Eastern European Car cleaning team, knackered old cars or stacks of old tyres...and Why? Because keeping something nice; adding a bit of colour and putting in a bit of effort is just too much for us. In Tokyo it appears nothing is to much effort...even the drivers of trains on other platforms waiting patiently for their turn to leave the shiny platforms, stand in the doorways of their polished trains in their starch pressed grey uniforms; and pristine white gloves and wave at you as you leave the station, with beaming smiles of sincerity.

I was touched by that simple expression of human courtesy, and embarrassed with just how unfriendly London can be. I shook my head and pondered a thought. Could I imagine Bob Crowe and his merry band of communist arsehole drivers doing that - remembering that these are the people who regularly hold London to economic ransom with unwarranted strikes? Mmm No - I don't think they have any notion or understanding of what "service" actually means.

My blood pressure having gone sky high just thinking about that nasty little commie thug Crowe - My attention eventually turned to my Bill Bryson book and my bloodpressure lowered.

I had seen Bill give an after dinner speech in the Savoy, just before the refurb programme commenced at the INTELECT dinner and I was atrracted to his incredible dry, witty sense of humour. He is a great observationalist and I had bought "Notes From A Small Island" to read.

I flipped open the page and jumped in. Within seconds I was laughing out loud, much to the obvious amusement of my fellow pilgrims...Bill was obviously infectious! He was fondly recalling his first trip to England in 1973 - the year after I was born, and discovering all of our (i.e english) ideosynchracies.

It felt surreal reading about Mrs Smegma's B&B in Dover; his purchase of the tres jolie plastic model of the Virgin Mary standing in a grotto of sea shells and dried seaweed in Calais; and his dismay with the disappearance of "Gropecunt st" in London...as paddi fields flew by me as I sat on a train on the other side of the planet - enjoying every moment of my time there but at the same time been lovingly reminded by Bill after just 70 pages of pure bliss just why I love London and why I am fortunate to live there.

2.5 funfilled hours later, the tain arrived in Nikko. We all disembarked and I orienated myself with the maps and off I trotted up the 2.5km hill road to get to the start of the shrines. The hill is full of weird shops and crappy food stores but when you get to the top - it is a differnt story. When I got to the top I saw the beautiful Shin-Kyo Bridge - wooden and red spanning the river below which was a picture postcard shot..I then continued climbing north and found the Rinno Ji and the stunning Tosho gu Shrines. They are nestled high up in the mountains, surrounded by forests of gigantic pine and spruce trees. The shrines are beautiful...and I am so pleased I took the time to get out of Tokyo to see them.

The climate was perfect, and the air smelt of that warm pine smell you often smell when it has ben raining in a forest. Toshu Gu was built in the 17th century as a mousolieum for the Shogun - Tokugawa Leyasu. I will post some photos shortly. ..but what I also discovered is that this is where the "hear no evil, speak no evil and see no evil" Monkeys come from! I walked around for a couple of hours before returning to Nikko station for the inbound trek back to Tokyo...

The trek back to Tokyo was relaxing, I nodded off at one point because I'd walked about 10kms...and felt it! As I faded, gradually the sun dimmed too, and bid us farewell for another day, and as it did, the curtains came up for the evening performance of the billion lights that light up Tokyo at night...what a show...and what a day - night night.